The Gym

I've always had an aversion to the gym and exercise. I've only once agreed to the numerous invitation to join a friend at the gym. (Not counting the one time I agreed because I wanted to soak in the pool.)

My typical thoughts that have to do with the gym include: "What if I use a machine incorrectly and embarrass myself?" "Are my stomach rolls showing?" "I smell like a moldy fridge crossed with an onion." "What if I run out of breath after running 3 minutes and the cute guy on the next machine thinks I'm pathetic?" "The girl in the sports bra over there has great boobs. I hate my boobs. I don't got any." "Ouch! Leg Cramp!"

I don't like the gym for all those reasons and oh so many more. I like telling people that the gym is an evil place. The gym is a result of our male centric superficial society and I refuse to take part in it, I indignantly say.

But secretly,I'm a gym fanatic. Getting up early to go workout or hitting the gym after work is the stuff of dreams to me. Literally. The stuff of dreams. I am so excited about the gym that I dream about it. Many a night I have dreams that I'm running on a treadmill or pumping iron. In reality, I don't actually go to the gym. The number of times I've been to the gym in my ENTIRE LIFE can be counted on my two hands. Thinking about going is enough for me.

That is until I met a real gym fanatic. She was the fellow who proceeded me at my post here in Manila. In the week that I stayed with her, she would get up every morning at 7 to "have a quick jog" in the basement before heading to work. It made her feel refreshed she said.

I hated it. As long as I didn't know a real gym fanatic, I felt like "well it's the thought that counts" was enough. Now, that I knew a real gym fanatic I felt the petty jealousy welling up inside. I wanted to be a gym fanatic. She was the real McCoy. I hated her because I wanted to be her.

After she left, I returned to my "oooo yeah! I just had a great run on the treadmill this morning IN MY MIND. "


Until today that is. I, for some unknown reason, decided to go to the gym and run. I did misuse some equipment. I ran out of breathe in 2 minutes on the treadmill. I ended up smelling like moldy fridge and onion.


...And I'm going back for more tomorrow... or maybe Wednesday.

I'm determined to go to the gym at least 3 times a week just like I'm determined to make this blog happen.

Let's see which one fails first.